i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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