I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
