So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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