We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
