speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
