Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
