i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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