eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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