Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
We named our party play list daddy issues
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
