I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
