he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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