I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
don't judge my taste in strippers
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
