he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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