can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize
