we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
