btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
