The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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