Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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