We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
