Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
