Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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