So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
