drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
