sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
