Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
