Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
