Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
