goodnight i made you a song goodbye
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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