call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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