i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
