exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
