Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
