HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
