Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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