NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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