and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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