is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Its about making memories worth repressing
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
smell my finger.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
