It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
We got so high we made milksteak
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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