Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
