Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
