You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
