what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize