this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
