wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
