dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize