My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
