OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
