Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
