Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
