did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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